What do you do when life throws dirt at you?

...Once there was a donkey that fell in a very large hole.  The farmer did not know what to do.  He simply decided the best thing was to bury the donkey.  He began to shovel dirt into the hole.  At first the donkey panicked – he was being buried alive!  How could the farmer do such a cruel thing to him?

The dirt was getting very heavy on the donkeys back so he shook the dirt off.  The farmer continued to shovel the dirt into the hole and the donkey shook it off – a shovel of dirt, a shake off by the donkey, another shovel, another shake.  Soon the dirt began to pile up under the donkeys feet.  He realized that each time he shook the dirt off his back, the mound beneath him got taller and if he chose to step up onto the mound, he got closer to the top of the hole.  The farmer shoveled the dirt, the donkey shook it off and stepped up…higher and higher the donkey went.  Shovel of dirt, shake it off, step up…shovel of dirt, shake it off, step up.  Shovel, shake, step up – shovel, shake, step up.  Finally the donkey was standing so tall he could walk freely and easily out of the very hole he feared would bury him alive.

Life can throw dirt at us.  We can feel buried by challenges and trials and feel like giving up.  But we can also use the dirt that is thrown at us, to build character and rise up.  Sooner or later dirt will be thrown at you, but what you do with it is up to you.  You can use it to build your future or cover your grave.

What do you do when life throws dirt at you?  Do you shake it off and step up on it?  Remember, with each step up, you are closer to the top.  Wisdom is the view from the hilltop with much dirt under your feet.

Shake it off and step up – Shake it off and step up – Shake it off and step up

The Wisdom in Your Potential...

"There are two great days in a person's life ... the day we are born, and the day we discover why.” ~William Barclay

You ask, “Why what?” Why you were created the way you were created? Why you have the unique DNA that you have? Why you have these dreams in your heart? Why you have this urge inside to unleash the potential and go after your passion?

What is YOUR why? What is your potential?

After pondering a bit on these questions, I thought I would share with you some wisdom I have found. Four steps to begin to find your why…your potential:

1. Define who you are….what do you value most in life?

These could be qualities like openness, honesty, and trustworthiness, or traits like creativity, focus and aptitude. Think of your best friend. What characteristics does he/she display that you value/appreciate?

2. Identify your strengths….what are you really good at doing?

Some people can make the most incredibly attractive scrapbooks of their children’s activities. They just know the right colours, shapes, and tag lines to create a treasured keepsake of memories. Other people are a total wiz on the computer and ‘wow’ me with how quickly they can assess and FIX hardware and software quandaries. Still others have the patience to spend an entire day with 25 first graders on a field trip to the biggest museum in town, and walk away with a smile on their face and a spring in their step.

3. Discover what you know…life has taught you much; you know more than you think.
I have one child who is good at spelling. (The other child…not so much.) It is rather effortless for my youngest to do well on spelling tests and Spelling Bees. She is no National Bee champ or anything like that, but plain and simple, she knows how to spell some fairly difficult words.

4. Acknowledge your uniqueness…there is only one YOU.

The marvelous Liz Strauss says, “Know who you are and where you stand – claim your space.” The amazing Marianne Williamson says, “We can always choose to perceive things differently. You can focus on what's wrong in your life, or you can focus on what's right.”

What is YOUR why? What is your potential?

The legendary speaker Tony Robbins began a new series on television this week called Breakthrough. Watching Tony pour his heart into the featured married couple was inspiring and encouraging. Everyone watching the episode could see the potential of these two people. One of my favorite quotes by Mr. Robbins… “Life is found in the dance between your deepest desire and your greatest fear."

Can you learn to dance with your potential?
If inside, you feel that you were made for more, but are afraid to move, I encourage you to decide today to take that first step into the unknown. Then take another step.

…Step even when you are afraid.
…Step when you are insecure.
…Step when you are safe.
…Step when it’s stormy.
…Step when you don't see what's coming.

Before long, you will find that each step you take weaves together to create a beautiful dance...a dance that is your amazing life…a dance that is uniquely YOU. I look forward to the day when I see you teaching others to dance too.

Now it’s your turn...

What wisdom have you gained in dancing with your potential?

Hope Will Not Be Extinguished...

It was 40 days ago we stood at the cemetery, April wind blowing through our hair, gathered around the casket of a family member. The heels on my sandals sank into the saturated grass, dowsed with a heavy rain the night before. My teenage daughter and I stood with linked arms supporting each other through our grief and tears. A Lieutenant Colonel of the United States Army in full military uniform stood to attention ready to address the quiet mourners. He removed from his pocket, a single white sheet of paper. With shaking hands and legs and a quiver in his voice, he delivered a passionate and heartfelt story recounting the numerous times he was impacted by the man we were burying. This soldier was not family by blood but by choice – choosing to honor our heroic family member with the title “dad”. This decorated officer, who committed his life to serve a purpose greater than himself, struggled to speak each word, choking back the tears while he stood alone in front of the crowd. For 20 minutes we listened to a courageous leader share nugget after nugget of extraordinary wisdom – he touched the hearts of everyone in attendance.

Sorrow shows up without invitation...but it cannot extinguish hope.

The sorrow was still with us, but we saw a new hope in this soldier’s words. He was evidence of a life that was changed because one man took the time to mentor and share his wisdom with another. We stood taller and felt proud to be part of such a giving family.

Now just 40 days after that unforgettable event, we are mourning the death of the Lieutenant Colonel who was killed during duty in Afghanistan by a suicide bomber.

Sorrow shows up without invitation…but it cannot extinguish hope.

Today our hearts are filled with even deeper sorrow. It seems to take more courage than before to find hope in this horrific circumstance. Twenty-four hours have passed since this news shook my world. I now have begun to rise up and choose to look for the hope – a choice everyone has to make on their own.

Just a few months ago, I began a new venture called The Wisdom Project. I’ve spent all my time and efforts gathering stories of Wisdom, for a book, from women around the world. The foundation of this project lies in the hope that when one person shares their wisdom – another person is strengthened. This is the hope I wish to give to others to encourage and inspire generations. This is the hope I want to pass on.

All this sorrow came into my life without an invitation, but the hope will not be extinguished. It will live on through The Wisdom Project.



For questions about The Wisdom Project go to:
http://www.thewisdomproject.info/

To submit a story, please send an email to:
yourstory@thewisdomproject.info

Stop Settling and Start Living...

It was a dreary, overcast morning; the kind that make it hard to get out of bed and get started on your day. A few upbeat songs came on the radio that cleared my head and got me in the right frame of mind to get my workout completed. While at the club, a woman who was working out next to me, started sharing with the trainer that she had some changes going on in her life. Her husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s at the age of 62 and now he moved to a care facility at 70 years of age because his mind was gone. She was trying desperately to keep going and remain positive, but the reality of the experience was staring her straight in the face demanding to be noticed.

Many thoughts raced through my mind about this man’s young age, how short life is and how we just don’t know what tomorrow will bring. Yet more than anything, I just wanted to know…did he make the most of every day before the Alzheimer’s stole his life? Did he make his work a priority or did he laugh with his family and create memories with them? Did he talk about where he would go ‘someday’ or did he travel and experience the incredible world we live in? Did he settle for mediocrity or did he embrace all that life has to offer? Did he take things for granted or did he tell the people who meant the most to him that he loved them?

“There are many things in life that will catch our eye but only a few will catch your heart…pursue those.”

No one can predict how much time we have left to live our life. If there is something tugging at your heartstrings that you have been putting off, why not pursue it. Even if life has thrown you a string of curve balls trying to strike you out, why not pick today to stand back up, brush yourself off and try again. Make a plan, talk to someone, pay attention to the things other people do that you find fascinating and start experiencing all those things you’ve wanted to do but never have.

“Dream what you want to dream; go where you want to go; be what you want to be, because you have only one life and one chance to do all the things you want to do.”

Make today the day you stop settling and start living.

Real Life Fender Benders...

While running errands today, a song came on the radio that has a catchy little tune and quirky words that strike home with women. I started humming along the first time I heard it and now my daughter enjoys singing along as well. Its fun, relatable message goes something like this… “Got couple dents in my fender – got a couple rips in my jeans – trying to put the pieces together, but perfection is my enemy”. This song, “Free to Be Me” is sung by a girl named Francesca Battistelli.

I had to chuckle to myself today because my 16 year old put a dent in my husbands sedan earlier this month. She was driving with her father, and while parking at the mall, she happened to hit the gas pedal instead of the brake. The car popped up over the curb and knocked over the small ‘temporary parking’ sign on a metal post in front of her. My daughter and my husband each were startled but the moment of fear caused opposite reactions to the minor event - One being silence with a frozen look on her face, the other a verbal outburst.

Some time has passed and we now giggle when we see the sign, which has once again tilted toward the ground because of the unfortunate incident. When retelling the story, friends have asked how we can now make light of this incident…typically from mom’s who have children close to the age of 16.

Here’s what I learned that can help you:

1) Find a Practical Perspective
“When you look at yourself from a universal standpoint, something inside always reminds or informs you that there are bigger and better things to worry about.” (Albert Einstein) In the overall scheme of things, this was a minor accident, but a good teaching moment. Truthfully, it gave both parties involved, a chance to learn and grow. One received education on what to do when denting dad’s car, the other was reminded not to sweat the small stuff because it’s all small stuff.
2) Have a Reasonable Expectation
“In the middle of every difficulty, lies opportunity.” (Albert Einstein) Expecting that our new driver will go through the learning curve perfectly is unrealistic. Understanding and accepting this while going through this trying time for both parent and child, allows us the freedom to become flexible. When there is room to breath, an opportunity exists for discovery, independence, wisdom and certainty to grow.
3) Say a Sensible Word
“Correction does much, but encouragement does more.” (Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe) Will there be more fender benders? Probably. Will there be more good driving experiences than bad? Yes. It seems that from all my past ‘dents’ and ‘rips’, it is better to encourage someone to pick themselves up one more time and try again, rather than let them know all that they have done wrong.

No one ever said life is easy. Many of us have to experience things a couple of times before realizing the lesson. When we keep our perspectives and expectations in check, while speaking encouragement, we are free to laugh and sing while we put the pieces together from our real life ‘rips’ and ‘dents’.

Declaring Independence...

Independence Day - Fourth of July. Americans love their freedoms. Freedom to travel where they want, choose the home they live in, pick a career and a lifestyle. We even sing about the land of the free and the home of the brave. The Declaration of Independence embodies the values of Americans; the right of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

On this Independence Day 2009, I find myself reflecting on freedoms of all kinds as I lie on the couch recovering from knee surgery just two days prior. With a pillow under my affected leg and bandages covering the stitches, I’m forced to take things slowly. My family is ‘on call’ 24/7 because the ability to run up the steps quickly to get my glasses or scoot into the kitchen for a sandwich is quite difficult for me. Ironic isn’t it? That today, July 4th, is the day that America is celebrating our country’s freedom with family gatherings, cookouts and fireworks and here I sit completely DEpendent on others for help.

By in large, I am a person, who loves freedom. I prefer to be in control, to have the freedom to change my mind and to have a variety of choices for how to live my life. Independence and freedom are comfort zones for me. But today, I’m taking time to appreciate all that I have and the amazing potential that is before me.

This focus on freedom reminded me of something that Robert Kiyosaki’s wife Kim wrote in her book Rich Woman…“With every little victory you accomplish, your confidence increases. Increased confidence leads to higher self-esteem. Higher self-esteem leads to greater success, which ultimately leads to the greatest gift of all – freedom.”

The Declaration of Independence was a victory for America. In turn, this country gained confidence and esteem which ultimately led to our greatest gift of freedom. For you and me, each personal victory elevates certainty and value. The freedom we’ve gained from those events is something to appreciate.

What personal victories have you experienced? Today may be the time for you to reflect on the freedom and independence you have gained and declare your future potential.